New Releases by Jim Benton

La série à succès Mon journal full nul est hilarante! Maintenant le journal de Jasmine Kelly a un nouveau style avec une touche d''humour. Mon journal full nul : une nouvelle année est encore à se tordre de rire! Alors que Jasmine essaie toujours de résoudre les énigmes de l''école secondaire, elle a encore plus de mal à comprendre les expressions telles que « Tout le monde sait que plus on aime quelqu''un, moins on essaie de lui plaire » et « Les gens ne se rendent pas compte de l''énergie qu''il faut pour faire des bêtises. » (Jasmine n''a aucune idée que tout le monde lit son journal. Surtout, ne lui dites rien!)

Jamie, Isabella, and Angeline have known each other for a long time. They''ve even become friends -- whether Jamie likes it or not. But when the trio starts a friendly competition, all bets are off. The loser will be treated to a game of Dare or Worse Dare ... with Isabella. (And Jamie''s pretty sure that''s like having a banana-peeling contest with a starving monkey. The monkey always wins.) What could go wrong? Probably everything. And it''s probably all that blondwad Angeline''s fault. Probably.

Bestselling author Jamie Kelly has been keeping diaries for years . . . and each one just gets funnier! But she has no idea that anyone is reading them. So please, please, please don''t tell her.Something strange is happening at Mackerel Middle School. Even stranger than Jamie and Isabella becoming friends with Angeline. (Which is still really, really strange.) Jamie can suddenly and inexplicably understand the weirdest and most mysterious creatures around: Boys.And there''s only one logical explanation --- superpowers.

Bestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with an all-new, all-funny diary! But she has no idea that anybody is reading it. So please, please, please don''t tell her.Dear Dumb Diary,So now I''m friends with Angeline. This is automatic friendship, and I have to just accept it and make the best of things. See, if I objected, then Aunt Carol might divorce Angeline''s uncle, sending both of them tumbling into a deep pit of depression for the rest of their lives, and Angeline could wind up feeling so guilty that she would have to go be locked up in an old dirty insane asylum for years and years, and Stinker''s puppies could grow up not knowing both their parents --- and I couldn''t live with myself for doing something like that to a puppy.

Read the hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice), diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true...or at least as true as it needs to be.Her best friend''s a backstabber. Her worst enemy is a sweetheart. And her dog is just waiting for the right moment to seek his revenge. Why should Jamie even bother going to school? Why not? After a run-in with Mega-Popular Angeline, aka Pure Evil, Jamie reforms her selfish ways & becomes the decent human being she never thought she could be. But she quickly realizes that helping others kind of stinks. Is someone trying to thwart her attempts at irresistible inner beauty? Or will Jamie finally achieve the "I''m an angel" glow she knows will make Hudson Rivers fall madly in love w/ her?

Read the hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice), diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true...or at least as true as it needs to be.Dear Dumb Diary,My social studies teacher, Mr. VanDoy, never smiles. I know that''s hard to believe, because everybody smiles about something, right?Isabella smiles when her brothers get in trouble. Angeline smiles when she thinks about how much prettier she is than, like, a waterfall or a unicorn. I smile when I think about a unicorn kicking Angeline over a waterfall. But Mr. VanDoy doesn''t smile at all. I wonder if when you become an adult, you can lose your sense of humor the way you lose your teeth or hair or fashion sense.

Read the hilarious, candid (& sometimes mean) diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true...or at least as true as it needs to be. In this book, Jamie contends with Angeline, the school''s prettiest, most popular girl (who Jamie thinks is a goon!) and the impending visit of her troll-like little cousin. Will Jamie survive? Will she go mad? Will she send her mom''s nasty casserole to starving children in Wheretheheckistan? You''ll just have to read the first installment of Dear Dumb Diary to find out!

Everyone''s favorite Mackerel Middle-Schooler, Jamie Kelly, is back with another hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice) diary!There''s a new girl in at Mackerel Middle School.Colette is friendly, fabulous, smart, totally talented, and an all-around amazing individual. She is more brilliantly diabolical than Isabella, as blindly loyal as Stinker, and even harder-to-resist than Angeline. It''s enough to make Jamie throw up a little. And Jamie just can''t help but wonder: Is it humanly possible for a girl to be more perfectly perfect than the most perfect girl in the world?

Read the hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice), diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true -- or at least as true as it needs to be.They were just a soft, ordinary pair of thrift-shop jeans until Jamie Kelly tried them on . . . Then they became a tight, scratchy, slightly smelly, and utterly ordinary pair of thrift-shop jeans with an embarrassing haunting problem. Do the pants have the power to soothe a vengeful beagle, vanquish The Prettiest Girl in the World, or make the wearer irresistible to the eighth cutest guy in the grade? Are the haunted pants so dazzling they can hurt and maybe permanently damage the eyes of onlookers? Or are the haunted pants just, well, haunted (which is kind of gross when you think about it)?

Sneak a peek inside the NY Times bestselling diary of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything she writes is true -- or at least as true as it needs to be.Dear Dumb Diary,Isabella is probably right. She almost always is.When I think back on all the things I''ve seen Angeline do, the one thing they have in common is that they''re all dumb. (They''re all strawberry-scented, too, but I think that''s just her conditioner -- although her body might actually secrete its own strawberry scent.)But of all the dumb things she''s ever done, this has got to be the dumbest. . . .

Read the hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice), diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true -- or at least as true as it needs to be.Jamie is crushing on Hudson. Someone too-gross-to-be- named is crushing on Jamie. And Hudson is crushing on . . . Princess Turd of Turdsylvania (a.k.a. The Prettiest Girl in the World). Middle school may be grim, but it''s no fairy tale. And crazy doesn''t even begin to cover it.

Bestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with an all-new, all-funny diary! But she has no idea that anybody is reading it. So please, please, please don''t tell her.School''s out for the summer, and that means no more Meat Loaf Thursdays, Sunday homework-cramming, or teachers (way way unsuccessfully) trying to act cool. It also means that certain Mackerel Middle Schoolers have a lot of time on their hands . . . and seriously empty pockets. Isabella is going to change all that. And Jamie and Angeline are going to help --- whether they like it or not. It''s the best kind of teamwork: When a whole bunch of people work together to do something wrong, instead of doing it wrong one at a time.

Bestselling author Jim Benton is back, with a brand-new spin on a favorite series! Bestselling author Jim Benton is back, with a brand-new spin on a favorite series!Dear Dumb Diary is a hilarious hit! Now after 12 books (each covering a month of her life), Jamie Kelly''s upcoming diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. It''s Dear Dumb Diary: Year Two! The diary entries are still laugh-out-loud funny -- but this is a whole new beginning. Everything is another year dumber!As Jamie grapples with school, grades, and middle school''s Big Questions, don''t miss even more of her words of wisdom like, "If someone is really, really intelligent, it would be polite if they would ugly it up a bit before they left the house."(Jamie STILL has no idea that anybody is reading her diary. So please, please, please don''t tell her.)

Whatever you do, DON''T read Jamie Kelly''s bestselling diaries! The bestselling Dear Dumb Diary series is a hilarious hit! Now Jamie Kelly''s diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. Dear Dumb Diary Year Two is still laugh-out-loud funny -- but everything is another year dumber!As Jamie continues to grapple with middle school''s Big Questions, she drops even more snarky gems of wisdom like, "Everybody knows that the more you love somebody, the less you try to look nice for them," and "People don''t appreciate how much willpower it takes to do the wrong thing."(But Jamie STILL has no idea that anybody is reading her diary. So please, please, please don''t tell her.)

Do NOT read Jamie Kelly''s top-secret diaries! "Sometimes it amazes me how ingenious I am about everything." --Jamie KellyWe''ve been with Jamie Kelly through her search for inner beauty, poofy bridesmaid dresses, and desperate attempts to make money during summer vacation. Along the way, she''s left us with countless gems of wisdom, such as: "If somebody ever asks you to kick her in the face, the first thing she will do is forget that she asked you to do it," and "As long as you keep laughing at how dumb something is, you can secretly enjoy it without risking your cool."Now Jamie''s upcoming diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. It''s Dear Dumb Diary: Year Two! The diary entries are still laugh-out-loud funny -- but this is a whole new beginning. Everything is another year dumber!(But Jamie STILL has no idea that anybody is reading her diary. So please, please, please don''t tell her.)

Goosebumps and Bill Nye the Science Guy fans, meet Franny! Being a mad scientist in the modern world is very hard work. With so much that needs to be done in such a short period of time, multitasking can become overwhelming. Franny needs some additional help. But for Franny there is only one person in the world she trusts to help her with her experiments: herself. So she acquires assistance the mad-scientist way…by building a few real, live, steel-plated Franbots!

Bestselling author Jim Benton returns, with a brand-new spin on a favorite series! Dear Dumb Diary is a hilarious hit! Now after twelve books (each covering a month of her life), Jamie Kelly''s upcoming diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. It''s Dear Dumb Diary: Year Two! The diary entries are still laugh-out-loud funny but this is a whole new beginning. Everything is another year dumber! As Jamie grapples with school, grades, and more of middle school''s Big Questions, don''t miss even more of her words of wisdom like, "If someone is really, really intelligent, it would be polite if they would ugly it up a bit before they left the house." Jamie STILL has no idea that anybody is reading her diary. So please, please, please don''t tell her.)

Franny K. Stein is not your average girl—she’s a mad scientist. She prefers poison ivy to daisies, and when Franny jumps rope, she uses her pet snake. The kids in Franny’s class think she’s weird, wacky, and just plain creepy. Tired of being stared at, Franny decides to attempt her most dangerous experiment yet—she’s going to fit in. But when a giant Monstrous Fiend attacks the class, everyone knows only a true mad scientist can save the day. But has Franny lost her creepy, crawly ways?

As Jamie continues to grapple with middle school''s Big Questions, she drops even more snarky gems of wisdom like, "Everybody knows that the more you love somebody, the less you try to look nice for them."

Jamie Kelly chronicles her second year of middle school in her diary, where she deals with new teachers, confronts Angelina and the other pretty people in school, and struggles in math class.

Jamie''s struggles continue with school issues, grades, and getting along with others.

"It''s an eventful month for Jamie Kelly. Stinker and Stickybuns'' litter of puppies has arrived, which makes Jamie and her nemesis Angeline "in-laws by dog". " -- publisher.

Jamie''s struggles continue with school issues and grades, especially in math, as she ponders life''s big questions.

"Jim Benton''s tales from Mackerel Middle School."

School''s out for summer, and that means no more Meatloaf Thursdays, Sunday homework cramming, or teachers (way way unsucessfully) trying to act cool. It also means that Mackerel Middle Schoolers have a lot of time on their hands...and seriously empty pockets.Isabella is going to change all of that. And Jamie and Angeline are going to help--whether they like it or not. It''s the best kind of teamwork: when a whole bunch of people work together to do something wrong, instead of doing wrong one at a time.

Organization is for people who are just too lazy to spend two hours looking for something. Get organized with this laugh-out-loud funny school planner, full of snark, wit . . . and stickers! This cool trifold format is packed with laughs! Jamie Kelly brings DDD fans a school planner with two sheets of stickers, a pen, and three interactive books: Glamorously Important Notes, All About Me, and Addresses of People I Don''t Hate (Mostly). Complete with fill-ins, prompts, extra places to jot down assignments, and some brand-new full color art, this is one school planner everyone will want! After all, PLANNING to put something off until the day before it''s due is a totally legitimate kind of planning.

Jamie Kelly reveals in her diary that she has agreed to be friends with Angeline in order to save her aunt Carol''s marriage to the girl''s uncle, and details the problems associated with the friendship.

The Small Business Bible

The three-headed book: Lunch walks among us; The invisible Fran; The Fran that time forgot.