New Releases by Augusten Burroughs

From the #1 bestselling author of Running with Scissors and Dry—a contagiously funny, heartwarming, shocking, twisted, and absolutely magical collection. True stories that give voice to the thoughts we all have but dare not mention. It begins with a Tang Instant Breakfast Drink television commercial when Augusten was seven. Then there is the contest of wills with the deranged cleaning lady. The execution of a rodent carried out with military precision and utter horror. Telemarketing revenge. Dating an undertaker. And much more. A collection of true stories that are universal in their appeal, yet unabashedly intimate and very funny.

Chloe befriends a mischievous crow and they begin to swap presents every morning, but Chloe realizes some of Crow''s gifts for her are stolen items.

From the number one New York Times bestselling author comes another stunning memoir that is tender, touching...and just a little spooky. "Here’s a partial list of things I don’t believe in: God. The Devil. Heaven. Hell. Bigfoot. Ancient Aliens. Past lives. Life after death. Vampires. Zombies. Reiki. Homeopathy. Rolfing. Reflexology. Note that ''witches'' and ''witchcraft'' are absent from this list. The thing is, I wouldn’t believe in them, and I would privately ridicule any idiot who did, except for one thing: I am a witch." For as long as Augusten Burroughs could remember, he knew things he shouldn''t have known. He manifested things that shouldn''t have come to pass. And he told exactly no one about this, save one person: his mother. His mother reassured him that it was all perfectly normal, that he was descended from a long line of witches, going back to the days of the early American colonies. And that this family tree was filled with witches. It was a bond that he and his mother shared--until the day she left him in the care of her psychiatrist to be raised in his family (but that''s a whole other story). After that, Augusten was on his own. On his own to navigate the world of this tricky power; on his own to either use or misuse this gift. From the hilarious to the terrifying, Toil & Trouble is a chronicle of one man''s journey to understand himself, to reconcile the powers he can wield with things with which he is helpless. There are very few things that are coincidences, as you will learn in Toil & Trouble. Ghosts are real, trees can want to kill you, beavers are the spawn of Satan, houses are alive, and in the end, love is the most powerful magic of all.

From the #1 New York Times bestselling author, a hilarious and ultimately tender, moving memoir

Après Courir avec des ciseaux, récit autobiographique de son adolescence, l''auteur récidive avec Déboire et nous livre le témoignage drôle et poignant de son combat contre l''alcoolisme. Augusten, autodidacte ambitieux et la vingtaine bien tapée, se trouve propulsé comme créatif dans l''univers impitoyable de la publicité à New York. Seulement voilà, toujours hanté par les démons de son passé, le jeune homme voue un amour immodéré à l''alcool sous tous ses dérivés. Une tare qui l''expulse illico de sa boîte de Pandore pour le catapulter dans un centre de désintoxication aussi gay qu''invraisemblable et tout bonnement décalé. ... Avec son style incomparable, un humour et une détresse touchants, Augusten Burroughs nous surprend une fois encore en nous offrant une nouvelle tranche de sa drôle de vie et une belle leçon de fraternité. "Augusten Burroughs est un surdoué des lettres" Elle

Roman autobiographique choc, Courir avec des ciseaux est le récit tragicomique d''une enfance et d''une adolescence hors norme, dans l''Amérique déjantée des années 1970. Dans l''ombre de parents psychotiques, Augusten rêve de gloire et de paillettes. Lorsque son psy devient son tuteur légal, une vie encore plus déjantée s''ouvre à lui, dans un foyer stupéfiant d''extravagance. Libre à chacun de mâchouiller des croquettes pour chiens devant la télé ou de jouer avec la machine à électrochocs. Le récit poignant et hilarant d''une enfance pas comme les autres. " Augusten Burroughs se raconte drôlement bien : le comique de la situation est répercuté de scène en scène, jusqu''à la fin, pour ombrager pudiquement le drame de la perte de l''enfance. " Le Matricule des Anges Traduit de l''anglais (États-Unis) par Christine Barbaste

An advertising executive remembers his childhood with his eccentric foster family and his early adulthood experiences of trying to establish an independent life for himself.

If you''re fat and fail every diet, if you''re thin but can''t get thin enough, if you lose your job, if your child dies, if you are diagnosed with cancer, if you always end up with exactly the wrong kind of person, if you always end up alone, if you can''t get over the past, if your parents are insane and ruining your life, if you really and truly wish you were dead, if you feel like it''s your destiny to be a star, if you believe life has a grudge against you, if you don''t want to have sex with your spouse and don''t know why, if you feel so ashamed, if you''re lost in life. If you have ever wondered, How am I aupposed to survive this? This is How.

From the number-one bestselling author of Running with Scissors and Dry comes TAKE FIVE, a mini collection of true stories that give voice to the thoughts that we all have but dare not mention—stories that shine a flashlight into both dark and hilarious places. TAKE FIVE includes the following four favorite previously-published essays plus one brand-new, never-been-published essay by Augusten Burroughs: --MINT THRESHOLD --UNCLEAR SAILING --COMMERICAL BREAK --DEBBIE''S REQUIREMENTS --SWAN SONG (new!)

With gimleteyed wit and illuminated prose, Augusten shows how the holidays bring out the worst in us and sometimes, just sometimes, the very, very best. You''ve eaten too much candy at Christmas...but have you ever eaten the face off a six-foot stuffed Santa? You''ve seen gingerbread houses...but have you ever made your own gingerbread tenement? You''ve woken up with a hangover...but have you ever woken up next to Kris Kringle himself? Augusten Burroughs has, and in this caustically funny, nostalgic, poignant, and moving collection he recounts Christmases past and present—as only he could.

Augusten, el chico aquel de Recortes de mi vida, el hijo de la poeta demente y el torvo profesor de filosofía, al que su madre abandonó en cuerpo y psique en manos del doctor Finch y de su excéntrica familia extensa –mujer oficial, mujeres no oficiales, h

"As a little boy, I had a dream that my father had taken me to the woods where there was a dead body. He buried it and told me I must never tell. It was the only thing we''d ever done together as father and son, and I promised not to tell. But unlike most dreams, the memory of this one never left me. And sometimes...I wasn''t altogether sure about one thing: was it just a dream?" When Augusten Burroughs was small, his father was a shadowy presence in his life: a form on the stairs, a cough from the basement, a silent figure smoking a cigarette in the dark. As Augusten grew older, something sinister within his father began to unfurl. Something dark and secretive that could not be named. Betrayal after shocking betrayal ensued, and Augusten''s childhood was over. The kind of father he wanted didn''t exist for him. This father was distant, aloof, uninterested... And then the "games" began. With A Wolf at the Table, Augusten Burroughs makes a quantum leap into untapped emotional terrain: the radical pendulum swing between love and hate, the unspeakably terrifying relationship between father and son. Told with scorching honesty and penetrating insight, it is a story for anyone who has ever longed for unconditional love from a parent. Though harrowing and brutal, A Wolf at the Table will ultimately leave you buoyed with the profound joy of simply being alive. It''s a memoir of stunning psychological cruelty and the redemptive power of hope.

Depuis l''enfance, la vie d''Augusten flirte avec des sommets tragi-comiques. De sa minute de gloire manquée dans un spot publicitaire pour la boisson Tang à la conviction terrible et ridicule d''avoir été adopté, ses premiers déboires ont tôt fait de le rendre alcoolique. Et lorsqu''il tourne le dos aux frasques d''antan, s''il rencontre l''amour et le succès, ce n''est certainement pas le fruit du hasard. Non, rien n''est fortuit. Il y a tant de choses qu''Augusten contrôle par la seule force de son esprit... Avec un humour acide teinté de tendresse, Augusten Burroughs se met en scène dans une série d''aventures aussi impossibles que vraies. Loin de tracer un destin d''exception, il éclaire d''un jour loufoque des secrets parfaitement universels et se moque de nous autant que de lui-même. Aussi terrifiant de réalisme qu''hilarant.

This is the true story of a boy whose mother (a poet with delusions of Anne Sexton) gave him away to be raised by her psychiatrist, a dead-ringer for Santa and a lunatic in the bargain. Suddenly, at age twelve, Augusten Burroughs found himself living in a dilapidated Victorian in perfect squalor. The doctor''s bizarre family, a few patients, and a pedophile living in the backyard shed completed the tableau. Here, there were no rules, there was no school. The Christmas tree stayed up until summer, and Valium was eaten like Pez. And when things got dull, there was always the vintage electroshock therapy machine under the stairs. It is at turns foul and harrowing, compelling and maniacally funny, but above all, it chronicles an ordinary boy''s survival under the most extraordinary circumstances.

A collection of amusing essays in which the author shares incidents from his childhood and sometimes complicated life as an adult.

An incisive fictional portrait of a consumer society gone mad looks behind the scenes of sellevision, a shop-at-home network, where the slick facades of the popular hosts slowly crumble as one celebrity becomes an addict and another exposes himself on air.

"Running with Scissors" is the true story of a boy whose mother (a poet with delusions of Anne Sexton) gave him away to be raised by her psychiatrist, a dead ringer for Santa and a lunatic in the bargain. Suddenly, at age twelve, Augusten Burroughs found himself living in a dilapidated Victorian in perfect squalor. The doctor''s bizarre family, a few patients, and a pedophile living in the backyard shed completed the tableau. Here, there were no rules; there was no school. The Christmas tree stayed up until summer, and Valium was eaten like Pez. And when things got dull, there was always the vintage electroshock-therapy machine under the stairs....