Best Selling Books by Jamie Thomson

Winner of the 2012 Roald Dahl Funny Prize! Thirteen-year-old schoolboy, Dirk Lloyd, has a dark secret - in fact he is a dark secret. Dirk - according to his own account - is the earthly incarnation of a Dark Lord, supreme ruler of the Darklands and leader of great armies of orcs and warriors, intent on destruction and bloody devastation. Following a colossal final battle between the forces of good and evil, the Dark Lord was defeated and hurled by his arch-foe''s spells into the Pit of Uttermost Despair. At the bottom of the Pit lies...a supermarket car park in the municipal town of Whiteshields, somewhere in modern day England. And when he is found, and tries to explain that he is the Dark Lord, people think he means Dirk Lloyd. The fact that he''s trapped in the puny body of a schoolboy doesn''t help. And so begins Dirk''s battle to recover his dignity, his power, and his lands... Along the way he faces the inconvenience of being fostered by a do-gooding family, the Purejoies; the torture of endless hours of drudgery at the Whiteshields Brainwashing Centre (aka school); a vengeful Headmaster; two interfering Psychotic Persecutors (psychotherapists); and constant laughter and disrespect when he attempts to marshall his lackeys and lickspittles (friends) to do what he wants them to. Dirk makes friends with the son of his foster family, Christopher, and the local Goth Girl, Sooz, and together they attempt to cast a spell that will transport Dirk back to his homeland. Inevitably, not everything goes to plan... But that''s for book 2 Roald Dahl Prize winner, 2012.

Abducted by aliens, Harry wakes up on his birthday marooned on a spaceship. His only companions: two freaky princess clones, a weird alien-fish-kangaroo hybrid with delusions of grandeur and a ship''s computer with a serious attitude problem. It''s the worst birthday ever. How is he ever going to get back to Earth now? A brilliantly silly new story from the winner of the Roald Dahl Funny Prize

Dirk Lloyd, the Dark Lord trapped in the boy of a weedy schoolboy, returns in a darkly hilarious adventure set in the most ghoulish school you''ll encounter this side of the Darklands ... Fourth in the brilliant series that began with the Roald Dahl Funny Prize-winning DARK LORD: THE TEENAGE YEARS, also chosen as one of the Sunday Times''s 100 Modern Children Classics. Perfect for fans of Philip Reeve and David Walliams.

Learn the Smart Way to Invest, Make Money and Generate a Passive Income in the Stock Market The Stock Market can be a ''Financial Game Changer'' for anyone that invests their time to learn about how to do it the Smart-Way, but sadly, many miss out on the great money-making machine of the stock market. But why? They don''t know where to start. It all seems too complicated! They hear that the stock market is ''too risky'' and are afraid to invest. They are unsure how much to invest, where to invest and when to invest. They have invested before; they lost their money and are cautious about trying again. There is too much terminology to understand. If you want to make money as a beginner in the stock market, you need to learn the investment principles that the experts teach that will provide a long-term and passive income that you can depend upon. Jamie Thomson brings together the exact methods that he''s been teaching to stock investors for over 20 years, and now you too can benefit from his vast knowledge and experience from the ''Beginners Guide to the Stock Market''. This book will teach you all the strategies you need to start while avoiding the costly mistakes that beginners do make. In this book, you will discover: The 7 Essential Money Guiding Principles to know before you invest How to create your online broking account The secrets to picking stocks that are about to ''Take-Off'' What stocks are best to buy and when How to develop an investment plan regardless of your age How to keep your portfolio safe during stock crashes The 7 Biggest Mistakes that beginners do make and how to avoid them How to create a stock investing automation system so you can ''set and forget''. How to generate a long-term passive income to secure your financial freedom Learn how to invest in stocks with CONFIDENCE regardless of market movements Plus much, much more As a bonus, you will also have access to your very own stock market and financial plan template to plan out your long-term investment strategy. Even if you have never traded before, this book will have you ready to take action and create real wealth by investing in the Stock Market.

Dirk Lloyd, the Dark Lord trapped in the body of a weedy schoolboy, returns in another darkly hilarious adventure... Brilliantly funny and subversive, this is the Funny Prize-winning Jamie Thomson at his best. Fear me, o miserable worm! I, the Great Dirk, take up my pen once more to record the utter misery that is SCHOOL. My sworn enemy, Hasdruban the White, has infiltrated Whiteshields School and seeks vengeance on me. Naturally, I will triumph. But it is the Dirkest Hour indeed... BUY THIS BOOK OR SUFFER ONE OF THE FOLLOWING: -Being struck with a Blast of Ravening Flame -Banishment to the Slave Pits of Never Ending Toil -Torment by the Hewer of Limbs THE CHOICE IS YOURS. MWA HA HA!

THE DAY THAT TRAGEDY STRUCK "Gasping back tears of horror and anger, Varren shimmied his way down the well. In the circle of light above his head three ugly, scarred, war-bitten faces appeared, staring down at him. One of them was readying his crossbow. Varren released his grip and fell straight down into the water. A crossbow quarrel whooshed into the water next to him. He hauled himself out, and into a side tunnel just above the water level. He''d used this way in and out of the castle for years. He hurried off down the tunnel, the sounds of battle fading away behind him..." From acclaimed children''s fantasy writer Jamie Thomson, author of DARK LORD: THE EARLY YEARS, comes the first in a thrilling new series of adventure novels for 8-12 year-olds set in the world of the Fabled Lands.

A choose-your-own-adventure style gamebook that gives the reader a choice of different quests and adventures. The book is open-ended and provides an almost unlimited number of plot lines. You can be a warrior, explorer, priest, wizard, thief or bard. The books in the series are inter-connected, allowing you to travel all across the Fabled Lands. This volume takes you across freezing tundra and northern wastelands dotted with ancient tombs, lost cities and haunted ruins.

Clint Eastwood meets Night of the Living Dead in a gothic fantasy horror with cowboys. In this interactive novel, YOU make choices for all three leading characters, and YOU determine the outcome of the story. "It doesn''t get more immersive than this."

"There is little time now, Avenger, for the gods of evil move against us still. You must return the Scrolls of Kettsuin to their rightful place at the Temple of the Rock on the Island of Tranquil Dreams, but your journey will be beset with dangers . . . " These are the words of your god Kwon. Courage and skill in his service have rewarded you greatly. You alone were able to recover the stolen scrolls of Kettsuin, guardian of the secret word of power. You alone have defeated the assassin. But now you have a new mission. You must escape your vengeful enemies and flee the mainland to return the scrolls to their rightful place. It is a long and dangerous journey - for the agents of the gods of evil will pursue you until death. THE WAY OF THE TIGER is the role-playing adventure classic now revised and expanded for today. You choose the skills and martial arts moves to defeat your enemy, gaining knowledge and honing your abilities to use in further books. Are you ready for the Way of the Tiger?

Arcadia. The garden of the gods of Olympus. Once they walked its sylvan paths, sipping ambrosia, drinking the wines of Dionysus, and filling the arboreal groves with their laughter. Satyrs and centaurs gambolled in the sunlit groves, sprites and dryads tended to the trees and flowers. Even mortals, those chosen of the gods, enjoyed the revels. Everywhere life blossomed with joyous abandon. But Pan plays his pipes no more, Artemis hunts not in the deep forests-green, dryads and nymphs dance no longer in dappled moonlit glades to the music of the spheres. Silence reigns over the weed-infested garden walkways. Ancient trees, long untended, clog the forest trails, roots rise up from the ground to topple the statues, fountains and sundials, cracking open the conservatories and summer houses. The great rivers, babbling brooks and simple streams have long since dried up, nothing sleeps in their beds now but desiccated earth and bleached bones. Yet what is to be done? The gods sleep, so it must be the mortals, feeble though they are, pitiful even, to whom the task must fall. Who can restore the wild woods to their glorious, arboreal splendour? Who can rebuild Arcadia and wake the sleeping gods? Who but you? * * * As you explore you will forge friendships, meet companions, make enemies - all of whom have long memories and will help or hinder you throughout your adventures. In this vast open world you will find hundreds of amazing quests, make choices with lasting consequences, win glory, cheat death, and face challenges at every turn. Every decision is in your hands. Start in any book, be whoever you choose, go anywhere you please, and do anything you want. The only limit is your imagination.

A choose-your-own-adventure style gamebook that gives the reader a choice of different quests and adventures. The book is open-ended and provides an almost unlimited number of plot lines. You can be a warrior, explorer, priest, wizard, thief or bard. The books in the series are inter-connected, allowing you to travel all across the Fabled Lands. In this second volume of the series, you adventure in a land of faerie magic, folklore and bucolic whimsy.

A choose-your-own-adventure style gamebook that gives the reader a choice of different quests and adventures. The book is open-ended and provides an almost unlimited number of plot lines. You can be a warrior, explorer, priest, wizard, thief or bard. The books in the series are inter-connected, allowing you to travel all across the Fabled Lands.

Harry was just an ordinary teenage boy from Croydon when he was abducted by aliens and accidentally became the captain of their starship. His quest to get back home to Earth continues - but now he''s acquired an alien ''son'' and a new spacecraft, and he''s being pursued by an eight-foot robot bounty hunter... Could this be a galaxy too far for Harry? Another hilarious story from the Roald Dahl Funny Prize-winning author of the DARK LORD series.

A choose-your-own-adventure style gamebook that gives the reader a choice of different quests and adventures. The book is open-ended and provides an almost unlimited number of plot lines. You can be a warrior, explorer, priest, wizard, thief or bard. The books in the series are inter-connected, allowing you to travel all across the Fabled Lands. In this volume you get to sail over the oceans, experiencing fantastic adventures to rival those of Odysseus, Jason and Sinbad.

Le Monde d''Orbus, autrefois paisible, se trouve confronté à un terrible danger. Des forces maléfiques sont à l''œuvre pour tenter de le soumettre à l''effroyable pouvoir du Démon, et VOUS seul pouvez empêcher que la catastrophe ne survienne. Vous aurez pour mission de détruire le Talisman de la Mort avant que les serviteurs du Prince de l''Ombre ne vous anéantissent. Mais prenez garde, car le temps vous est compté...

"Fear me, o miserable worm! I, the Great Dirk, take up my pen once more to record the utter misery that is SCHOOL. My sworn enemy, Hasdruban the White, has infiltrated Whiteshields School and seeks vengeance on me. Naturally, I will triumph"--Publisher''s description.

Harry was just an ordinary teenage boy from Croydon when he was abducted by aliens and accidentally became the captain of their starship. His quest to get back home to Earth continues - but now he''s acquired an alien ''son'' and a new spacecraft, and he''s being pursued by an eight-foot robot bounty hunter.

Sooz, a 13 yr old girl from Surrey has become the Dark Mistress of Dirk''s otherworldly kingdom, the Darklands. Thanks to the Ring of Power given to her by Dirk, his minions recognize her as their ruler. Sooz immediately sets about redecorating Dirk''s Dark Tower to the taste of a young girl. But Sooz has to face her toughest challenge when an army of fanatical paladins and orcs gather to march against her. Despite their centuries of hostility to each other, they prefer to form an alliance rather than accept Sooz''s new regime. And what of Dirk? He continues on slaving away at school, plotting ways to rescue Sooz. Eventually he is able to advise her on life in the Darklands and Sooz is able to hold back the fanatical paladins.